Feb 17th 2013

47 days till I leave for Sweden! wow time is going so fast, it is crazy. There are so many things I want to do in LA within these 47 days! like hang out in Malibu at least 3 more times, go to Salvation Mountain, the MOCA, grand central market, Alfred Coffee shop, etc, etc, etc.

I decided I'm going to start yelping. The past two months I've been a yelp fanatic, searching like crazy all of the coffee shops around town and trying each from of them out. Even more recently it's been with vegan food and craft beer (not that I'm vegan, I'm just obsessed with the life style). So...I think I'm going to documenting all my food, beer and coffee adventures around the world.
Food in general, though. My mind has always revolved around food- whether it was for the good or the bad- whatever the case, I'm into it! Whether it's being a food photographer, food journalist,  a food blogger or maybe one day down the road opening a restaurant

Ugh so much to do on this earth!
I also am going to get back into my running/ working out routine with 30 minutes AT LEAST a day. (I feel silly writing this on my blog...but it's a good outlet to reaffirm myself).

Tomorrows goals:
work out, go to the bank, apply for a Swedish Visa, make some vegan recipe with cauliflower, tan (sorry to all the other earthlings not living in SoCal) and go to work.

Feb 13th 2014

Last night Jayden was wildly running around the pool while mother watered the lawn. Instead of helping my mom stop her from running, I decided to smile and photograph it. I swear she is going to be a daring creature as she gets older. I get excited everyday knowing she is getting bigger and growing older. My sister is the most beautiful human I've ever met. She hates when my door is closed, she'll knock for 10 minutes straight screaming "TEE TEE!!!!!!" (" sister"in 2 year old language) until I open the door so she can pick up a drawing pad a scribble carelessly for 30 minutes. She loves when I play music...whenever a song transitions into the next song she'll stop drawing and look at me like "where did the music go?". She loves helping me clean my room, even though it's not helping in my eyes- but it is in hers. She loves sitting on my lap while I go on the computer, naming all the people she knows through photos and recognizing the colors that are on the screen. Whenever I start to get bothered because I am busy doing something on my phone or computer , and she is rummaging through my stuff is when I realize that this is when I should be spending time with her- observing her, teaching her and loving on her.   I get sad when I work night shifts and I can't be at home to spend the night with her. I get tears in my eyes when I think that I'll be leaving her for 4 months when I go away to Sweden. She is so unique, I love her.

Feb 12 2014

I was on a run the other night and on the last 5 minutes a thought came across my mind of "who am I"…I think it might have started with the fact that I was thinking of how I've been single for a significant amount of time, which lead to the thought of how people are always telling me how blessed this opportunity is to be single, to discover who you are blah blah blah. I've always been on this mission of who I am, as a young child. I always look up to teenagers and young adults, thinking they were so cool. I always wanted to be older. I got into my teens and I still have on this huge mission of discovering myself. It was a beautifully painful experience. Painful because I really didn't understand who I was and beautiful because I could sing along and relate to lyrics like "my roots have grown but I don't know where they are".  After all those thoughts flooded through my brain I realized that I think I have a pretty good grip on who I am. Recently I've had to incredible craving to learn- about everything and even more recently I've learned deeper about myself. It has been such a beautiful journey. I truly am surrounded with a great group of humans in my life who reaffirm me, care about me and people whom I truly care of as well- not to mention they are from all over the world. I've been on a serious mission of making my life greater-stretching myself to be able to accomplish much and praying that God will use me in a multitude of ways. I don't know about you, but I want to be someone who God trusts with A LOT. I don't want to just survive, I want to thrive and live out the most beautiful moments. I just want to serve. I've been in such transition season of my life- my whole mind continues to be renewed and I feel like lately scales have been removing from my eyes and I've been seeing the world around me in a more raw way.

Speaking on beauty, I've been experiencing the most unexplainable beautifully simple moments in life with much gratitude  and have been  in awe of life lately. A couple nights ago I was in my bed, in the dark and there was just a little bit of light entering the closed blinds of my window from outside and that light softly illuminated the square window fading out into complete darkness. I was half asleep but it was simple yet so breath taking. Another time I was driving down the street to get coffee and this acoustic song I had never heard came on, and it was such an amazing moment- with the sound, the  warmth of the day and the golden light that was shinning on every building. This morning I was laying in my backyard, attempting to get a little golden tan (I guess I'm just lucky to live in SoCal because everywhere else is freezing- but this is normal to me, not weird) and the sun was so bright it forced me to close my eyes but every time I would open them the feeling of the outdoors was incredible- I don't even know words to explain it. Every sight was so beautiful. Tonight in church while we were worshipping, the lead singer stopped singing and the voices of the crowd were SO powerful, it brought such happiness to my heart and I fully embraced the moment.

I guess I have been embracing life lately, or maybe life is embracing me-- whichever the case, God really is good, he answers so many prayers- little ones, big ones, anything. 

I'm so all about life right now

15 days till Portland
50 days till Sweden

Azadeh Music Photoshoot:

facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/AzadehMusic

 

February 7th 2014

I just bought a plane ticket to Seattle for the 2nd-5th! and we're hopefully planning a day trip to Portland in there as well! it was a goal I set for myself before I leave for Sweden. I've literally been dreaming of these places for months, I'm excited to go!

Jayden had a cupcake tonight:

Feb 6th 2014

Feb 5th 2013

I'm laying around Annie's apartment after a long, beautiful, eventful day. I woke up in my bed with the expectation to leave my house around 9 am, which didn't happen. I slowly woke up, after a great night sleep and took time to dive into the day. I cooked, I cleaned, I decided I want to give all my clothes and things away and dress super plain. I am changing. I'm happier with less.
I left my house at 12 pm and headed to DTLA to the world trade center to figure out this Swedish Visa- whatever. I guess they don't do Sweden, so now I have to figure out something else.
So many laws, rules and regulations just to travel to roam another piece of the earth.
Anyway, after I went down to Spring for Coffee where I had the absolute BEST cold brew of my life. It was delicious, which made up for my slight fear of the area I was in. I don't feel like I feel very much fear anymore- but I guess when you're a young lady, alone, in a sketch part of town it's reasonable? I don't even know. Downtown LA is so interesting to me. One minute you're in a nice beautiful area and the next you could be down on skid row. Downtown LA makes me so curious. I want to know all of it's history.
I've been a very curious spirit this year. All 37 days of this year. Every day I've been exploring a new coffee shop, learning a lot about coffee, searching a ton of vegan cafes and trying them out (I'm not vegan, I'm just fascinated with the idea), discovering little venues and dive bars and appreciating every inch of what the world has to offer. I have definitely used Yelp more in this past month than my whole life.
Anyway, after coffee I headed over to Annie's apartment and hung out a bit- did some photo work and headed out to Silverlake  around 5 pm where I had an amazing vegan meal at this place called Flore Cafe. It had me incredibly full for the rest of the night. I walked around sunset blvd- which is super cool. Echo park, Silverlake and Los Feliz are next parts of the earth to uncover.
After I went to Amoeba, bought the Kodaline Cd and a ticket for their show at the end of this month. I really enjoy going to shows alone. I went to one a couple weeks ago and loved it. It was so intimate and left me with no distractions so I could fully engage.
I went to church at 8pm and I loved it. It was about leadership. Everyone I know has been coming to this church with me- Mosaic, that I have been going to since November. It makes my heart super happy.
In the midst of day I didn't know where my camera was, which sucked because I've been trying to take snapshots of the human beings I've been around...so I just took a selfie.
Now I'm back at Annie's, where my camera was innocently laying on the table.
I'm happy, I'm growing and I'm more curious than ever.

Feb 4th 2014

""I'm afraid to fear God because I know everything in my life will change... I'm happy right now,  I don't want that to change""

me to random guy: so tell me your life story
random guy: HOW did I know you were going to ask me that

such an amazing night

Feb 3rd 2014

Feb 1st 2014

Jayden turns 2!