My heart ached a little as I was in line to show my boarding pass to the ladies guiding me to the cozy Icelandic airplane back to Sweden. I walked through the narrow hallway towards the plane reminiscing of all the amazing memories like meeting my beautiful friend Tinna, the random folk bands playing on the street, the art that consumed all of the walls of the capitol city- Reyjkavik, the gentle language of the icelanders, the beautiful people I met and connections I made, the concerts in the garden, the open souls, the lasting friendships, the good coffee, the sun rays, the quiet atmosphere, the nude community showers, rooftop hot tubs, cold wind and cold feet, laughing and being silly, the snow capped mountains, the love I gave and received.
We lived in a community, at a church, of about 60 other people. We represented Sweden, Finland, Norway, Holland, America but each individual person came from so many places. Everyday we would have breakfast together, worship and a deep study of Colossians. After we would break into teams like evangelism, worship in the park, woman's ministry, sports, street healing, etc. God did so many miracles through these teams.
We also had this big white tent in a garden near a pond, which was open 24-7 and functioned like a outdoor church of some sort. There we served coffee and good conversation to anyone who wanted to stop by. Each night we would have gatherings, or concerts or just be a place where we could hang out with people we had met in the city of Reyjkavik.
The second day I met my dear friend, Tinna, which ended up being the biggest blessing to my whole trip. Everyday we would go out into the streets, having our end goal to reach the tent (about a 20 minute walk from the church). We would simply begin by praying for God to give us the right people to talk to and for him to guide our path. Sometimes we would never even reach the tent because God stopped us in our tracks talking to handful of people and by the time we looked at the clock, we had to head back home for dinner or something- but sometimes I would skip meals because the moments were too awesome to pass up. Some days it was really obvious; He told us to talk to everyone who had a cigarette in their hand and some days we just followed where our hearts went- whether it was in and out of cafes, skateparks, clothing stores, etc. It was so amazing and so filled with energy. I remember one day I stopped at this park and I saw a guy with a camera and my mouth just blurted out words when I didn't even try to speak. God moved in really crazy ways.
An "adventure" would be a good way to describe this week as well. Adventure is a word I've always coined; it sounds cool, trendy and I mean who doesn't want to say their an adventurous spirit? Here in Iceland God had an intimate conversation with me basically saying "you always say you are adventurous, are you willing to finally live adventurously…for Me?"
My answer was a timid "yes" but after this trip I boldly declare YES.
The morning before we left was… incredible, I had attended church in Iceland. I would like to say that I don't think I've felt the spirit so much before, even through a language I could not understand. Tears fell upon my face, and I couldn't resist them. They were tears of an overwhelming sense of happiness, fullness. I felt so in love with Jesus, with people, with the moment, the breathe, everything.
Leaving that night after an ice cream ending and much prayer, we traveled 10 more hours by bus, plane and train. Looking out the window of the plane, arriving in Stockholm, I saw the sun, something I hadn't seen for a last days in Iceland. It was nice to see the golden light shining on swaying trees in the distance upon the city and the sea. I still miss Iceland so much. From that moment until now I've been in a deep sleep. I might have slept 24 hours almost straight, with a meal or two but skipping most and a few answered emails. My heart felt split open, and drained empty, like I lost something. Like a small faint broken heart. My energy levels were gone, I could barely get out of bed.
A team from Columbia is here now with us for the week. They have been blessing us with so many words and visions from God. I realized through them that my batteries were low and needed to be recharged, that I needed to spend more intimate time with Jesus because He is the only one who would do this for me. I learned that I can't hold all of these moments in my heart and carry them too tight- that I need to give them back to God since He blessed me with them in the first place. I'm just too passionate. But here I am, in Sweden, therefore I will be in this moment, IN SWEDEN, serving and loving and blessing with every inch of my soul.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters" Colossians 3:23
This morning I woke up feeling good, back to my normal alive self. I was beginning to think something was wrong with me but I guess I had just given every ounce of my self, more than I ever have, to serving Iceland and I needed a whole day to sleep, rest and recharge.
Iceland might have been one of the most intimate times of my life, and part of that was learning how to love Jesus intimately. "Bold" and "vulnerable" are two words that can describe this past week, although they may contradict, they are the two most defining words to describe how my heart has grown. Wow I'm learning so much. You can never reach a point of being "too deep" with God- it's kind of overwhelming. You should really try, if you haven't already, get to know Jesus- intimately. It's quite beautiful.