my good pal spencer showed me this tonight
i reshowed it to megans, just now
i really do love it

so today was a really nice days. I woke up and it happened to be my mothers 40th birthday! I made her a really cute card, that i'll have to post. then I went to school and tones some of my prints. I really do love film and i am realizing i really love photography. then i went work and had a really good shift. forming bonds with co workers is a weird experience. then i hung out with spencer, cody, taylor and derek where i discovered this fantastic film.
now i'm sitting here with megan after moving a heavy floral couches
3 ladies on each end
climbing roof tops and figuring everything out.

we nearly forfeit

i, i'm telling darkness from lines on you

days like this I miss when I was carefree, feeling comfortable, fresh,wanting to go somewhere, loving every soul, having a soul to love



now I want to escape and adventure
particularly with someone
but I don't care if it's alone
because I need to do what I want to do

i can't wait for winter

can't grow up, in that iron ground

i need to start doing on more adventures
even if i go alone
come with me, if you want
relax and take pictures
pictures of my own
not an assignment

or someone shouting out my name to do so, either

up until now

my thoughts were criss crossed every single direction
tonight i know i have to take a leap into responsibility
by some awkward conversation and disapproving actions
i didn't feel comfortable
but it's 2:36 and I'm happy I'm home listening to my music
doing what I feel like, not what I feel I should
that leap; might have to be large
into a little hole of isolation to improve, improve
i said, responsibility and i mean it
maybe do some healthy things and change it all around
i'm praying


i have a lot of photos to catch up on
a lot of music to download
a lot to think about, and a lot of people to talk to
i'm missing of few people in my life
and i don't know what happened

9 pm, 9 am sharp.

I'm just about to go to bed, and it's 9 pm.

My foot hurts, my elbow hurts

I tripped down the stairs last night...as well as up

I've gone out countless nights in a row

and I'm exhausted

it's been fun, but it's time for real sleep

and I still have a lot of photos to catch up on.

today was fun, and eventful.

This morning I woke up to Brianna tapping on my window and then it all went down hill from there haah "wholeemgee" "my trunk is full but I'm empty" "the ride"

here is some of my favorite film photos I took today:

hibernate

frustration? only of the slightest kind

august 15 I'm flying to Santa Cruz, for a week. All I'm going to do is relax, learn, live, sight see, laugh, visit a good friend, visit my uncle, and take pictures that will be hidden. Maybe.

I'm hibernating
I'm hiding
I'm not posting any more pictures for a long while
Maybe of myself
But I'm too over whelmed and too consumed with what everyone else wants to see out of me. I'm starting to hate it. I need to find my outlet. I'm taking too many and it's becoming to hard on me. Truth is, is that I don't even want to take them anymore but I feel at ends with this constand demand that I see online and hear through the whispers of other souls.

I'm not understanding
It's blowing up so fast
and I feel so young
I am young

I used to search and search and search
It's not like that anymore

I mean I'll change back
but I'm reached my limits
I have two paid photoshoots and a wedding
After that I'm taking a break