I got baptized tonight

for the first time
no preparation
I knew it was the time
I didn't even want to go to church
this morning, OR tonight


I've been spiritually dead
fighting back and feeling selfish
tonight was the night to be obediant
nothing else matters
as I was waiting to leave early, the pastor (or Gods message through the pastor) he happened to say "and I stay till the end, nothing bugs me more then after the message people decide to leave early...just so they can get their daily bread and leave" it was a little super natural. NONE of my friends were there either, which is not normal. I think it was meant to be like that

I pray for a uplifting friend...someone to inspire ME. I feel like I'm always pouring into other people, and no one is pouring into me.

hannah happened to be my mentor tonight, which is crazy because I've grown up with her in a way. she always seems to pop up in my life.


from now on
Jessica is patient
Jessica is kind
She does not boast
and is not proud.
Jessica does not dishonor others
she is not self seeking
or easily angered
she keeps no records of wrong doings
Jessica does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.