stayed home sick, all day. got absolutely nothing done except I took some pictures and listened to Bon Iver.
I enjoyed myself actually.
I felt inspired.
Lately, my photography career is taking a turn. Yes, I love photography but I feel such more of a deeper person then to work with a camera for the rest of my life. Or a material item perhaps. I feel like with this photography class I am taking in college right now, it's waisting my time. I am not learning anything nor am I enjoying anything in that class- well besides my friends in that class ;) I also feel this photography world is full of self-righteous people and people that are constantly trying to be better then one another. I feel it's making me become more shallow and materialized with trying to say up to what it requires from you. I am not down for that. People have always told me I am going to make it big in the photography world, and sometimes I believe them but if that's how my life is going to go- I want it to find me...I don't want to struggle to become the best photographer. Time will tell, if I keep getting hired for jobs and what not. anyways, lately I am been so much in love with people and the world. Including human habits, what makes society what it is, etc. I want my ulitimate career to be something that changes people, where I make a difference in peoples lives. I want to deepen myself more and more.
I almost feel that people around me are more scared for me to find something else that I LOVE than I am.
I just want to experience life on my own, with no body telling me what I NEED to be doing.